Stress Relief

In a recent conversation with one of my co-workers, I made the statement "I'm what some people like to call "high strung." I hadn't meant it to be as funny as it apparently was, but she laughed super hard. I'm sure the sentiment would be most appreciated by people who know me best because it is so truthful.

I'm a pretty self-aware person who has accepted and can admit her faults. And one of them is how high strung I am. I am a worry wart. I turn molehills into mountains. I worry about things I can control, but mostly things I cannot. I dwell on things until I am so stressed out I can't even handle myself. Granted, I have had a lot of really high stressors in my life. I've been dealt really shitty cards more often than I would have ever wished upon anyone. But the bigger problem is not what I've overcome, but more so the way I handle what life throws my way. I get myself so worked up and stress and stress until it takes over my life.

Guys, stress is a pretty nasty habit. It screws with so much, your body being at the forefront. It can make you really sick. When I experience super strong emotions, especially anxiety, I throw up. It sucks. But also, stress can actually affect your immune system too. I can't count how many times I have seen people get terrible colds when their stress is at an ultimate high.

It can make you break out. As if being 25 with an acne problem isn't bad enough, throw a stressful few days or week in the mix, and you could mistake me for a local middle or high school student.

It can affect your sleep schedule. I'm prone to poor sleep and nightmares as it is, but when I'm really stressed, it gets worse. I spend the night tossing and turning and the higher my stress level is, the more vivid the nightmares. I wake up so exhausted that I feel like I didn't even sleep. Not to mention, I have to think if the person in my dream really did die. Nightmares get old and fast.

It can really change your personality, and usually for the worse. It has spun me into depressions. I've snapped at people because of the smallest things. Usually it gets taken out on Man Friend, who does nothing but try to help me. Sometimes, in the moment, I say things I don't mean or don't even think it's a problem to say. And then I feel awful. There's no need to snap at someone, especially if they're doing everything they can to be supportive. But I find that the people who are there for you the most are going to be the ones to take the brunt of the pain. A friend, who at the time had been dealing with something I had been as well, told me that her fiance said he didn't even recognize her anymore. That was such a sad thing to hear and made me wonder if my family and friends had been thinking the same about me.

After reading all of this, you must wonder how I manage to even get through life. It took a long time of stress just eating away at me to figure it out. Although it is still an ever-evolving work in progress, I am starting to get a lot better at managing stress and anxiety. I've found some really good relief:

• Go for a long walk. Grabbing your favorite music to jam to doesn't hurt either. Without any distractions around, it's a great way to collect yourself and get all your thoughts together. My walks usually start out worrisome and over-analyzing everything. However, after a while, the circulation starts going and I start calming myself down. By the time I'm ready to go home, I usually have worked my thoughts into a 180 and I've come up with solutions for whatever I need to.

• Cook or bake. Just under two years ago, I started teaching myself how to cook. I quickly found that I really enjoyed it. One of the reasons was how much stress relief it provides. Cooking and baking takes a lot of concentration and focus. If you're not paying attention, especially to a new recipe that you need instructions for, you're going to fuck it up some way or another. If you're not careful with knives, blades, heat or open flame, you're going to hurt yourself. Throwing all your energy into focusing on one things gets your mind off your troubles quickly. Plus, if you're a stress eater, you can make a really healthy meal that you feel good about eating. Added bonus: you can always share the meal with someone and have a nice conversation with over food. 

  

  Lavender is my favorite scent to add to a hot bath. How
  can you be upset after inhaling such a soothing and
  relaxing fragrance?

• Take a long, hot bath. It will calm your muscles and you will start to relax. Adding aromatherapy or soothing bath salts to the water will help too. Also, bring a good book with to get your mind off your anxiety. Make sure it's something you're really interested in or your mind will wander. Even if you're not a big reader, bring in a niche magazine dedicated to something you enjoy like cooking, music, cars or electronics. And if a glass of wine happens to follow you into the bathroom and find itself next to the tub, you won't see me judging. 

• Work out. Not only is this yet another way to take your mind away from dwelling by focusing on one thing, it releases endorphins. Endorphins are a natural mood booster that your body is kind enough to provide. And in the words of Elle Woods, "Exercise releases endorphins. Endorphins make people happy. Happy people don't kill their husbands. They just don't."

• Get a massage. I know that often times massages are something of luxury. And when money is a factor in your stress level, it's hard to justify some pampering. Sometimes a day at a spa can really do wonders, but it doesn't need to be extravagant. You can go to a massage school for a really cheap price and the students who work on you are already very experienced. There are also options like Groupon and sales to watch for to get a really cheap rate. Massages are not only relaxing, but can really melt a lot of worry away. They are also great for improving circulation, helping with chronic muscle aches and pain, improving sleep quality, and boosting moods. Hmm, sounds like a lot of what stress triggers.

• Bitch. Seriously, you need to bitch. Call up a friend or hang out together and just rant away. A huge factor in stress for a lot of people, myself included, is that it's hard to talk about your emotions. When you don't talk about what's bothering you, it just festers inside you. It gets bottled up until the tiniest thing pushes you over the edge and you blow up. There was one time in high school, at the prime of me not talking about anything, that I had really been dealing with a lot. I slept over at a friend's house and my mom was awesome enough to bring me an overnight bag. She forgot to pack my socks and birth control. During any ordinary circumstance, it wouldn't have been a big deal. I could have borrowed socks from my friend and taken my pill right away the next morning. But because I had been bottling up so much, I lost it and started bawling. It became known as the infamous Socks and Birth Control moment. Don't let a Socks and Birth Control moment happen to you.

• Go on humor websites. Scroll through the humor section on Pinterest or go on Buzzfeed. Watch stupid YouTube videos. The longer you laugh, the better you'll feel. Soon enough, you'll forget what was upsetting you. It may mean wasting a few hours of your life watching videos of children doing stupid things or reading countless some e-cards, but it's worth it.

• Volunteer. Giving back to your community and helping others, especially those in need, is such an incredible and powerful feeling. Knowing that you made someone else's day a little better or easier is a great way to lift your spirits. It might help you re-evaluate your concerns and perhaps they won't seem so bad anymore. If for nothing else, smiles are contagious. And being around everyone smiling for a short time will at least get you to smile for a few hours.